(self) knowledge is power.

I recently started to really tune in to my moods/feelings, and started tracking my days, and here's what details I include:

  1. How I feel each day (including all of my feelings, because it is normal they change through the day.) 
  2. What sign the moon is in (because that babe has more influence than most give it credit)  
  3. What I ate that day (because food is my most important tool)
  4. Who I interacted with (am I still allowing the energy vampires?) 
  5. Social media use/things I did that day (Did I spend all day scrolling through my phone/did I participate in my goals/hopes).
  6. Steve's health (This is obvious). 
  7. Where I am on my cycle (Again hormones are obvious and important). 
  8. Did I include any self care in my day (Am I helping cultivate healthy emotions, am I treating myself kindly?)

It may seem like a lot, but at the end of each day, I just jot down a few sentences reporting the essentials on the day, on average it takes me 5 minutes.

 So why am I taking 5 minutes and the paper to do this?

To be honest, I never put much thought into why I was feeling certain things, that didn't have an obvious explanation; I just sort of went in whatever direction my feelings wanted to take me.  It took me seeing those who I would hurt while I was following those feelings to realize I needed to understand. 

There's a power in knowledge, and 2017 really requires more learning and understanding; so I decided to start with myself.  It may appear a little premature to write on this, since I just started it Jan 1st, but I have found such valuable growth in this short time, I wanted to put it out there, in case anyone else is feeling a pull in this direction.  

I have gained more knowledge on the power of food, about my needs for alone time, and about how outside forces (ie: the moon, the world) influence me; but mostly I have gained patience. Without intending to, I find myself able to take that extra deep breath before reacting, or I find myself able to step away from something if it isn't for me (ie: social media). 

I know there are an increasing amount of things out of my control happening all around me; so now seemed like a great time to really gain some control on how I react.  I tried for a large time, and I believe the breakthrough where I understood my feelings toward Steve, displayed that understanding will be my guide.  

If you are reading this thinking, "I can relate to the unexplained feelings", "I snapped at my husband yesterday without knowing why", "I think I get angry without food too", or simply, "I would like to understand my feelings." Try it.  Make a time you do it everyday, and just sit down and quickly write it down.

The more I can understand myself, the more I can utilize my power.  Knowing what triggers me, is a large part of being able to withstand the waves in this world.  Bottom line is, knoweledge is power.