Are you really that positive Hope?

I get asked a lot from those on the social media world, "Are you really that positive Hope?"

The answer is mostly yes.  You see, I like everyone else, experience a wide ray of emotions through my days.  I experience the angers and frustrations life offers, and yes I feel sadness often.  I acknowledge all emotions because how can you move past them without acknowledging them.  

However, I don't set up camp there, and this is important.  I noticed about 3 years ago, that when I was feeling weighed down from the burdens that come with ALS, and sitting for long periods in the frustrations or sadness Steve would get sick.  The more aware I became of my emotions the more I could see the direct effects it would have on Steve.

So, I decided that in order to be the best caregiver I can for Steve, I was going to find ways to stop setting up camp in the negative.  It was hard, and if you knew us you saw the struggle.  This was before Steve & I shared everything openly on social media, so if you were following us from the outside you may not have seen the struggle.

It was there, and then I found yoga.  It not only helped me to become more present of the moment and to actually face what our days had, it helped me become more accepting.  I would be in total denial of Steve's progression of ALS, as would he; and yoga helped me get a reality check while also providing me skills to deal with the reality.  

People my whole life have told me, that I have a gift of finding the good in the bad, and it sort of amplified after I started implementing a practice into my daily life.  Now it's how I end my day.  I recognize the hard to face realities, feel those emotions for a minute, and then search for the good in it.  Truth be told, 100% of the time I find it.  It's always there, it just takes a different perspective.  

Learning to find more good in our situation, also opened me up to more good in myself.  I didn't think I had any talents, until I just started to paint for a release, and then slowly my soul opened up to creating in all realms.  

Today it's true, on days where I'm off, because yet again, I'm human and I have them; Steve has bad days too.  Knowing this connection we have keeps me very mindful of choosing the positive.  Because I chose this life with Steve, I choose to make it the best I can.  I can't change ALS or the toll it has taken (and will continue to do so) on Steve's body, but I can choose how we live our lives. 

So, I choose positive.  It's not always easy, but on days that are really hard, and Steve's looking to me out of eyes full of tears for that hope; it's worth it.  To be able to provide Steve with that extra boost to fight this disease.  It's always worth it.